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Derby · Season 5 · Round 16

The Pinch — Team Pack Race

The Pinch Works · The Pinch · 135 m · 16 competitors Pinch points Steep banking
FULL TIME Fairness
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Carnage — The Lieutenant survives to win

The Lieutenant took The Pinch — Team Pack Race for the Lump Patrol. Tube Sock finished second. 5 competitors failed to finish. The Wet Socks took the team honours.

#CompetitorTeamTimeGap Grid+/-ContactsTop speed
1 The Lieutenant LMP Lump Patrol 3:17.408 — 11 +10 36 11.5
2 Tube Sock WET The Wet Socks 3:18.908 +1.50 4 +2 9 10.6
3 Second Sock WET The Wet Socks 3:20.667 +3.26 3 0 11 10.4
4 Long John NOO The Noodles 3:22.542 +5.13 2 -2 10 10.2
5 Crooked Pete NOO The Noodles 3:23.592 +6.18 1 -4 9 10.9
6 Stubbs NUG The Nuggets 3:24.192 +6.78 9 +3 39 12.1
7 Custard SFT The Soft Boys 3:26.275 +8.87 15 +8 27 11.7
8 Honey Mustard NUG The Nuggets 3:31.417 +14.01 10 +2 45 11.6
9 Gravy LMP Lump Patrol 3:34.242 +16.83 12 +3 39 11.8
10 The Unit HEA Basement Heat 3:34.592 +17.18 7 -3 22 10.4
11 Butter Bean BEA The Beans 3:37.917 +20.51 5 -6 22 10.7
— The Kidney WRECKED BEA The Beans — — 6 -6 17 10.6
— The Coaster WRECKED PCK The Pucks — — 13 0 36 13.0
— Slapper WRECKED PCK The Pucks — — 14 0 30 11.8
— Radiator WRECKED HEA Basement Heat — — 8 -7 13 10.0
— Yolk WRECKED SFT The Soft Boys — — 16 0 12 11.5
2.800
Up it goes.
9.875
Oh, that is a big one.
14.692
That was always going to happen.
20.050
Slapper is on the move. Recent finishes: 16-1-2-1-1.
24.758
That was always going to happen.
29.008
Honey Mustard is losing bits.
34.717
That has come off.
40.050
Tube Sock is coming through.
45.108
Yolk leaves something behind.
50.050
There is nothing left of it. Recent finishes: 2-2-11-4-1.
56.300
Oh, that is a big one.
1:01.550
Somebody is going to have to sweep that up.
1:06.383
Yolk is out, and The Coaster did it.
1:11.750
There is nothing left of it.
1:16.867
That has come off.
1:21.742
They felt that in the back row. Recent finishes: 2-2-9-4-3.
1:26.725
That is a long way off the ground.
1:32.900
Custard is losing bits. Recent finishes: 4-5-1-3-12.
1:37.342
Radiator is out.
1:43.425
Oh, that is a big one. Recent finishes: 4-5-1-3-12.
1:47.908
There is nothing left of it.
1:54.675
That has come off.
2:00.050
That was always going to happen.
2:06.533
Stubbs is losing bits.
2:14.175
Beautiful. Just beautiful.
2:18.583
There goes a piece of The Coaster.
2:24.492
Absolute carnage.
2:29.142
Extraordinary scenes.
2:32.833
Slapper is out.
2:35.450
The Coaster is out.
2:44.383
That has come off.
2:49.233
Look at the state of it.
2:54.108
Oh, that is a big one.
2:55.608
Last lap.
3:01.067
They will not want to see that again.
3:09.342
That was always going to happen.
3:13.867
Wrecked, and out of the race.
3:14.408
Here comes The Lieutenant.
3:17.408
The Lieutenant wins the derby.
3:22.375
That is a long way off the ground.
SectionSurfaceLeader at exitElapsedFastest through
Smooth Descent Clay Slapper 19.967 Slapper 19.967
Smooth Descent Clay Slapper 44.300 The Lieutenant 22.041
Smooth Descent Clay Second Sock 1:06.658 The Coaster 19.816
Smooth Descent Clay The Lieutenant 1:28.433 Stubbs 19.383
Smooth Descent Clay The Lieutenant 1:50.050 Custard 21.075
Smooth Descent Clay The Lieutenant 2:11.825 The Coaster 21.041
Smooth Descent Clay The Lieutenant 2:32.675 The Lieutenant 20.850
Smooth Descent Clay The Lieutenant 2:54.433 Stubbs 18.717
Smooth Descent Clay The Lieutenant 3:17.408 Long John 21.109
#TeamScoreFinishersPoints
1 WET The Wet Socks 5 2/2 8
2 NOO The Noodles 9 2/2 7
3 LMP Lump Patrol 10 2/2 6
4 NUG The Nuggets 14 2/2 5
5 SFT The Soft Boys 23 1/2 4
6 BEA The Beans 23 1/2 3
7 HEA Basement Heat 25 1/2 2
8 PCK The Pucks 27 0/2 1
Pack races score the sum of a team's best three finishing positions. Lower is better.

Race card

16 declared
3
Crooked Pete The Noodles
95 starts, 1 win, average finish 9.0. Last five: 3-12-14-10-13.
155.95
7
Long John The Noodles
101 starts, 5 wins, average finish 5.3. Last five: 5-4-15-8-2.
10.01
2
Second Sock The Wet Socks
104 starts, 13 wins, average finish 4.0. Last five: 4-3-7-1-4.
2.58
11
Tube Sock The Wet Socks
100 starts, 13 wins, average finish 4.3. Last five: 3-3-5-1-3.
2.37
22
Butter Bean The Beans
106 starts, 1 win, average finish 8.8. Last five: 10-11-13-9-7.
177.73
6
The Kidney The Beans
92 starts, 0 wins, average finish 10.2. Last five: 8-12-13-9-11.
219.30
1
The Unit Basement Heat
91 starts, 3 wins, average finish 7.1. Last five: 10-5-7-7-2.
34.31
4
Radiator Basement Heat
115 starts, 0 wins, average finish 13.1. Last five: 15-15-14-14-13.
219.30
7
Stubbs The Nuggets
96 starts, 6 wins, average finish 7.9. Last five: 12-12-12-10-5.
173.24
2
Honey Mustard The Nuggets
97 starts, 4 wins, average finish 7.8. Last five: 6-11-8-14-8.
110.78
10
The Lieutenant Lump Patrol
93 starts, 20 wins, average finish 4.9. Last five: 3-9-1-1-1.
7.39
17
Gravy Lump Patrol
106 starts, 14 wins, average finish 7.1. Last five: 14-3-5-14-6.
103.55
3
The Coaster The Pucks
102 starts, 10 wins, average finish 8.0. Last five: 8-14-6-10-1.
100.41
8
Slapper The Pucks
91 starts, 8 wins, average finish 8.2. Last five: 3-2-2-15-11.
118.75
21
Custard The Soft Boys
97 starts, 4 wins, average finish 7.6. Last five: 16-13-8-12-2.
107.13
0
Yolk The Soft Boys
97 starts, 0 wins, average finish 14.2. Last five: 16-16-16-10-16.
219.30

Course preview

6 sections · 135 m
Smooth Descent Smooth
30m ↓15°
Smooth Descent Smooth
38m ↓15°
Smooth Descent Smooth
11m ↓15°
Smooth Descent Smooth
8m ↓15°
Smooth Descent Smooth
11m ↓15°
Smooth Descent Smooth
38m ↓15°

A disused rolling mill with an oval laid through the old loading bay, and a gap in the wall under four metres wide. Sixteen arrive at that gap together, two get through, and the rest sort it out — nine times a race, in front of a crowd that has stopped pretending it came for any other reason. The wall is original ironwork and has never once been repainted, on the grounds that it would only want doing again by Tuesday. Standing room is capped for reasons the management prefers not to put in writing.

On the record

0 calls

Nobody has committed to anything yet.