Paper Mogul Sports
Derby · Season 10 · Round 46

The Pinch — Team Pack Race

The Pinch Works · The Pinch · 135 m · 16 competitors Pinch points Steep banking
FULL TIME Fairness
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Carnage — Crooked Pete survives to win

Crooked Pete took The Pinch — Team Pack Race for the The Noodles. The Heel finished second. 4 competitors failed to finish. The Noodles took the team honours.

#CompetitorTeamTimeGap Grid+/-ContactsTop speed
1 Crooked Pete NOO The Noodles 3:16.808 2 +1 13 10.6
2 The Heel WET The Wet Socks 3:17.025 +0.22 4 +2 13 10.4
3 Thick Rick NUG The Nuggets 3:17.708 +0.90 9 +6 31 11.3
4 Custard SFT The Soft Boys 3:18.567 +1.76 15 +11 24 11.0
5 Second Sock WET The Wet Socks 3:20.842 +4.03 3 -2 13 10.5
6 Long John NOO The Noodles 3:21.100 +4.29 1 -5 13 10.2
7 The Lieutenant LMP Lump Patrol 3:22.625 +5.82 11 +4 36 12.3
8 Slapper PCK The Pucks 3:25.150 +8.34 13 +5 33 11.5
9 Old Gristle LMP Lump Patrol 3:32.233 +15.43 12 +3 42 12.3
10 Crawlspace HEA Basement Heat 3:32.367 +15.56 7 -3 14 10.9
11 Stubbs NUG The Nuggets 3:35.683 +18.88 10 -1 35 12.4
12 Butter Bean BEA The Beans 3:36.242 +19.43 6 -6 18 10.6
The Coaster WRECKED PCK The Pucks 14 +1 31 12.5
Squish WRECKED SFT The Soft Boys 16 +2 19 11.3
Radiator WRECKED HEA Basement Heat 8 -7 13 10.9
Refried Ron WRECKED BEA The Beans 5 -11 13 10.5
3.400
A new leader — Squish. Career record: 3 wins from 314, average finish 5.8.
10.025
Up it goes.
16.625
Extraordinary scenes.
20.867
That was always going to happen.
25.592
That has come off.
30.050
Thick Rick is on the move. Recent finishes: 3-3-2-8-3.
34.333
And it all goes wrong. Recent finishes: 6-1-1-1-3.
40.050
Look at Old Gristle go.
44.808
That was always going to happen. Recent finishes: 3-3-2-8-3.
49.783
The Lieutenant is airborne! Recent finishes: 2-3-1-2-2.
56.575
There goes a piece of Crooked Pete.
1:03.875
Slapper leaves something behind.
1:08.483
You do not see that every day.
1:12.758
Up it goes.
1:19.092
That has come off.
1:25.358
Stubbs is airborne!
1:30.050
It is unravelling for The Lieutenant.
1:34.750
That has come off.
1:40.050
You do not see that every day.
1:46.033
There is nothing left of it.
1:50.558
They will not want to see that again.
1:55.550
That is a long way off the ground.
1:59.800
The Lieutenant is airborne!
2:02.675
Refried Ron will not be back.
2:04.175
Radiator is out, and Crawlspace did it.
2:14.625
Beautiful. Just beautiful.
2:18.008
The Lieutenant has put Squish out.
2:22.358
Extraordinary scenes.
2:31.750
Up it goes.
2:36.275
Up it goes.
2:40.925
Up it goes.
2:45.225
Slapper is losing bits.
2:48.817
This is the last of it.
2:53.850
Somebody is going to have to sweep that up.
2:58.033
Stubbs has put The Coaster out.
3:03.067
There is nothing protecting Slapper now.
3:11.842
It is coming apart now.
3:13.808
Crooked Pete is coming to the flag.
3:15.308
Right on the line.
3:16.808
Crooked Pete takes it!
3:22.383
Up it goes.
SectionSurfaceLeader at exitElapsedFastest through
Smooth Descent Clay Squish 21.125 Squish 21.125
Smooth Descent Clay Custard 42.992 Custard 20.242
Smooth Descent Clay Custard 1:04.608 The Lieutenant 21.408
Smooth Descent Clay Custard 1:26.025 The Heel 20.758
Smooth Descent Clay The Coaster 1:45.858 The Coaster 19.325
Smooth Descent Clay The Coaster 2:06.658 The Coaster 20.800
Smooth Descent Clay The Coaster 2:28.158 Thick Rick 18.675
Smooth Descent Clay The Coaster 2:48.817 The Lieutenant 20.625
Smooth Descent Clay Crooked Pete 3:16.808 Custard 20.909
#TeamScoreFinishersPoints
1 NOO The Noodles 7 2/2 8
2 WET The Wet Socks 7 2/2 7
3 NUG The Nuggets 14 2/2 6
4 LMP Lump Patrol 16 2/2 5
5 SFT The Soft Boys 18 1/2 4
6 PCK The Pucks 21 1/2 3
7 HEA Basement Heat 25 1/2 2
8 BEA The Beans 28 1/2 1
Pack races score the sum of a team's best three finishing positions. Lower is better.

Race card

16 declared
7
Long John The Noodles
258 starts, 9 wins, average finish 5.6. Last five: 7-4-4-9-5.
7.62
3
Crooked Pete The Noodles
230 starts, 7 wins, average finish 8.8. Last five: 1-5-15-7-2.
63.92
2
Second Sock The Wet Socks
257 starts, 38 wins, average finish 4.0. Last five: 4-3-6-4-3.
2.12
9
The Heel The Wet Socks
223 starts, 20 wins, average finish 5.5. Last five: 5-5-13-2-11.
8.54
5
Refried Ron The Beans
237 starts, 0 wins, average finish 13.0. Last five: 13-14-14-9-15.
219.30
22
Butter Bean The Beans
254 starts, 1 win, average finish 8.7. Last five: 12-13-5-2-12.
99.14
13
Crawlspace Basement Heat
242 starts, 1 win, average finish 8.6. Last five: 10-10-11-11-2.
128.49
4
Radiator Basement Heat
262 starts, 0 wins, average finish 13.1. Last five: 15-12-11-14-15.
219.30
33
Thick Rick The Nuggets
239 starts, 7 wins, average finish 7.3. Last five: 4-10-6-14-1.
35.12
7
Stubbs The Nuggets
238 starts, 14 wins, average finish 7.8. Last five: 11-2-8-10-9.
54.23
10
The Lieutenant Lump Patrol
248 starts, 54 wins, average finish 5.1. Last five: 3-1-3-4-14.
5.29
44
Old Gristle Lump Patrol
253 starts, 61 wins, average finish 5.0. Last five: 7-4-7-2-6.
8.67
8
Slapper The Pucks
226 starts, 24 wins, average finish 8.6. Last five: 7-14-8-3-12.
206.91
3
The Coaster The Pucks
244 starts, 24 wins, average finish 7.6. Last five: 7-6-7-11-9.
59.37
21
Custard The Soft Boys
242 starts, 7 wins, average finish 7.8. Last five: 5-12-5-8-5.
79.17
2
Squish The Soft Boys
240 starts, 1 win, average finish 10.9. Last five: 13-12-9-15-10.
219.30

Course preview

6 sections · 135 m
Smooth Descent Smooth
30m ↓15°
Smooth Descent Smooth
38m ↓15°
Smooth Descent Smooth
11m ↓15°
Smooth Descent Smooth
8m ↓15°
Smooth Descent Smooth
11m ↓15°
Smooth Descent Smooth
38m ↓15°

A disused rolling mill with an oval laid through the old loading bay, and a gap in the wall under four metres wide. Sixteen arrive at that gap together, two get through, and the rest sort it out — nine times a race, in front of a crowd that has stopped pretending it came for any other reason. The wall is original ironwork and has never once been repainted, on the grounds that it would only want doing again by Tuesday. Standing room is capped for reasons the management prefers not to put in writing.

On the record

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