Derby · Season 5 · Round 17
Washboard Ring — Team Pack Race
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Fairness
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Carnage — The Lieutenant survives to win
The Lieutenant took Washboard Ring — Team Pack Race for the Lump Patrol. Old Gristle finished second. 11 competitors failed to finish. Lump Patrol took the team honours.
| # | Competitor | Team | Time | Gap | Grid | +/- | Contacts | Top speed |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| 1 | The Lieutenant | Lump Patrol | 3:25.417 | — | 12 | +11 | 43 | 12.6 |
| 2 | Old Gristle | Lump Patrol | 3:31.475 | +6.06 | 11 | +9 | 51 | 12.0 |
| 3 | Stubbs | The Nuggets | 3:45.400 | +19.98 | 9 | +6 | 56 | 11.8 |
| 4 | Tube Sock | The Wet Socks | 3:46.242 | +20.83 | 3 | -1 | 57 | 10.7 |
| 5 | Butter Bean | The Beans | 3:54.433 | +29.02 | 6 | +1 | 67 | 10.6 |
| — | Honey Mustard WRECKED | The Nuggets | — | — | 10 | +4 | 44 | 11.4 |
| — | Slapper WRECKED | The Pucks | — | — | 13 | +6 | 21 | 12.2 |
| — | The Coaster WRECKED | The Pucks | — | — | 14 | +6 | 31 | 11.7 |
| — | Custard WRECKED | The Soft Boys | — | — | 15 | +6 | 35 | 11.5 |
| — | Second Sock RUNNING | The Wet Socks | — | — | 4 | -6 | 33 | 10.4 |
| — | Long John RUNNING | The Noodles | — | — | 1 | -10 | 22 | 10.1 |
| — | Crawlspace WRECKED | Basement Heat | — | — | 7 | -5 | 21 | 10.1 |
| — | Big Randy WRECKED | The Noodles | — | — | 2 | -11 | 17 | 10.2 |
| — | Tender Greg WRECKED | The Soft Boys | — | — | 16 | +2 | 9 | 11.5 |
| — | Refried Ron WRECKED | The Beans | — | — | 5 | -10 | 13 | 10.1 |
| — | Radiator WRECKED | Basement Heat | — | — | 8 | -8 | 13 | 10.1 |
1.592
Extraordinary scenes.
5.992
The Lieutenant is airborne!
11.700
Absolute carnage.
16.000
Tender Greg goes to the front. Career record: 0 wins from 136, average finish 5.9.
21.300
Slapper takes the lead.
25.750
There goes a piece of Honey Mustard. Recent finishes: 7-4-10-1-15.
29.458
Radiator is out, and Second Sock did it.
31.125
Big Randy has put Refried Ron out.
35.925
Extraordinary scenes. Recent finishes: 5-5-3-2-4.
40.183
That is a long way off the ground. Recent finishes: 3-2-4-1-11.
46.517
Wrecked, and out of the race.
51.217
Second Sock is losing bits.
52.767
That is Crawlspace taking Big Randy with them. Recent finishes: 4-12-7-6-4.
57.983
Up it goes.
1:02.458
And that is Crawlspace finished.
1:07.425
Look at the state of it.
1:13.833
That is a long way off the ground.
1:18.708
That has come off.
1:23.308
You do not see that every day.
1:28.975
Custard leaves something behind.
1:34.117
Up it goes.
1:38.433
It is coming apart now.
1:43.900
That is a long way off the ground.
1:48.775
It is coming apart now.
1:52.450
Wrecked, and out of the race.
1:54.400
Wrecked, and out of the race.
1:57.317
And that is The Coaster finished.
2:03.733
Honey Mustard is airborne!
2:08.083
The Lieutenant is airborne!
2:17.133
The Lieutenant is losing bits.
2:22.158
Extraordinary scenes.
2:31.808
That has come off.
2:43.742
Beautiful. Just beautiful.
2:45.242
And that is Honey Mustard finished.
2:58.292
That is a long way off the ground.
3:04.767
One to go.
3:09.967
They will not want to see that again.
3:22.417
The Lieutenant has it.
3:25.417
The Lieutenant wins the derby.
3:29.650
Old Gristle is airborne!
3:44.800
Up it goes.
| Section | Surface | Leader at exit | Elapsed | Fastest through |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| Smooth Descent | Clay | Slapper | 22.525 | Slapper 22.525 |
| Smooth Descent | Clay | Slapper | 43.875 | Slapper 21.350 |
| Smooth Descent | Clay | The Lieutenant | 1:06.008 | The Lieutenant 18.550 |
| Smooth Descent | Clay | Slapper | 1:07.808 | Slapper 0.383 |
| Smooth Descent | Clay | Slapper | 1:32.758 | Stubbs 21.908 |
| Smooth Descent | Clay | Slapper | 1:52.108 | Old Gristle 19.167 |
| Smooth Descent | Clay | Old Gristle | 2:41.692 | Old Gristle 20.567 |
| Smooth Descent | Clay | The Lieutenant | 3:04.767 | The Lieutenant 23.092 |
| Smooth Descent | Clay | The Lieutenant | 3:25.417 | The Lieutenant 20.650 |
| # | Team | Score | Finishers | Points |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| 1 | Lump Patrol | 3 | 2/2 | 8 |
| 2 | The Nuggets | 9 | 1/2 | 7 |
| 3 | The Wet Socks | 14 | 1/2 | 6 |
| 4 | The Pucks | 15 | 0/2 | 5 |
| 5 | The Beans | 20 | 1/2 | 4 |
| 6 | The Soft Boys | 23 | 0/2 | 3 |
| 7 | The Noodles | 24 | 0/2 | 2 |
| 8 | Basement Heat | 28 | 0/2 | 1 |
Pack races score the sum of a team's best three finishing positions. Lower is better.
Race card
16 declared6
Tender Greg
The Soft Boys
106 starts, 0 wins, average finish 14.8. Last five: 16-16-15-10-15.
219.30
Course preview
6 sections · 135 m
Smooth Descent
Smooth
8m
↓15°
Smooth Descent
Smooth
14m
↓15°
Smooth Descent
Smooth
8m
↓15°
Smooth Descent
Smooth
38m
↓15°
Smooth Descent
Smooth
30m
↓15°
Smooth Descent
Smooth
38m
↓15°
Fourteen metres of corrugated deck plate laid across the main straight, crossed nine times a race. Nobody is ever taken out by it and nobody ever finishes intact — it does not wreck you, it disassembles you, one rivet at a time, and hands the pieces back at the flag. By the last lap the difference between a finisher and a heap of parts is simply who crossed it more cleanly. The stand sells earplugs at the gate; the noise is not a side effect, it is the attraction.
On the record
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