· Season 8 · Round 38
The Banister Classic — Team Pack Race
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Carnage — The Coaster survives to win
The Coaster took The Banister Classic — Team Pack Race for the The Pucks. Slapper finished second. 4 competitors failed to finish. The Pucks took the team honours.
| # | Competitor | Team | Time | Gap | Grid | +/- | Contacts | Top speed |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| — | The Coaster INCOMPLETE | The Pucks | 8:05.494 | — | 10 | +9 | 35 | 16.3 |
| — | Slapper INCOMPLETE | The Pucks | 8:15.283 | +9.79 | 11 | +9 | 36 | 13.9 |
| 3 | Old Gristle | Lump Patrol | 8:24.099 | +18.61 | 16 | +13 | 40 | 12.8 |
| — | Chunk INCOMPLETE | Lump Patrol | 8:52.183 | +46.69 | 14 | +10 | 41 | 14.2 |
| 5 | Stubbs | The Nuggets | 9:18.717 | +73.22 | 4 | -1 | 43 | 12.4 |
| 6 | Custard | The Soft Boys | 9:20.362 | +74.87 | 3 | -3 | 30 | 13.2 |
| 7 | Lil Nugget | The Nuggets | 9:28.528 | +83.03 | 15 | +8 | 29 | 13.0 |
| 8 | Squish | The Soft Boys | 9:40.122 | +94.63 | 12 | +4 | 28 | 15.5 |
| 9 | The Heel | The Wet Socks | 9:50.123 | +104.63 | 2 | -7 | 38 | 13.6 |
| 10 | Radiator | Basement Heat | 9:50.745 | +105.25 | 13 | +3 | 43 | 12.3 |
| 11 | Crooked Pete | The Noodles | 9:57.738 | +112.24 | 6 | -5 | 37 | 12.7 |
| 12 | Refried Ron | The Beans | 10:00.133 | +114.64 | 5 | -7 | 41 | 13.3 |
| 13 | The Kidney | The Beans | 10:01.534 | +116.04 | 7 | -6 | 48 | 12.5 |
| — | Long John INCOMPLETE | The Noodles | 10:02.616 | +117.12 | 8 | -6 | 35 | 11.9 |
| 15 | Damp Kevin | The Wet Socks | 10:05.972 | +120.48 | 1 | -14 | 41 | 11.7 |
| 16 | Pilot Light | Basement Heat | 10:07.899 | +122.41 | 9 | -7 | 40 | 13.6 |
0.017
Right into it goes The Kidney.
5.167
The lead changes hands. Chunk.
10.772
Chunk is airborne.
14.450
That is the sport, right there.
18.178
Beautiful. Just beautiful.
23.778
That is a big one for Old Gristle.
29.261
That is not going to help.
32.661
Somebody is going to have to explain that. Recent finishes: 1-8-1-1-9.
36.100
Well, that was always going to happen.
39.544
And Crooked Pete takes flight. Recent finishes: 5-11-6-9-7.
43.967
Up goes The Coaster. Recent finishes: 1-1-1-8-6.
47.467
Big air for Old Gristle.
50.906
Ooh, that looked like it hurt. Recent finishes: 2-3-4-2-3.
56.033
Custard is picking them off. Recent finishes: 4-7-4-5-4.
59.567
Up goes The Heel.
1:04.639
Lil Nugget gets air.
1:09.667
The lead changes hands. Old Gristle.
1:13.378
That is a big one for Stubbs.
1:17.594
Up goes Old Gristle.
1:21.667
Oh dear.
1:25.311
You do not see that every day.
1:29.611
Long John gets hit hard.
1:33.272
Crooked Pete is completely off the deck.
1:36.672
Extraordinary scenes.
1:40.883
And The Heel takes flight.
1:45.961
Big air for Old Gristle.
1:52.033
That is not going to help.
1:56.606
Squish finds trouble.
1:59.444
Here comes The Coaster.
2:02.444
It is The Coaster!
2:07.000
And it all goes wrong.
2:13.039
Crooked Pete gets hit hard.
2:17.056
That is a big one for Damp Kevin.
| Section | Surface | Leader at exit | Elapsed | Fastest through |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| Starting Ramp | Carpet | Lil Nugget | 1.589 | Chunk 1.572 |
| Smooth Descent | Carpet | Chunk | 4.861 | Stubbs 2.984 |
| Sweeping Curve | Carpet | Chunk | 7.228 | Chunk 2.367 |
| Smooth Descent | Carpet | Chunk | 10.400 | Old Gristle 2.800 |
| The Drops | Carpet | Chunk | 12.222 | Stubbs 1.406 |
| The Spiral | Metal | Stubbs | 15.617 | Stubbs 1.067 |
| Laundry Chute | Soft fabric | Chunk | 21.800 | Slapper 2.694 |
| Rotating Drum | Metal | Old Gristle | 24.700 | Damp Kevin 1.339 |
| Narrow Pipe | Metal | Old Gristle | 28.494 | Squish 1.616 |
| The Drops | Metal | Old Gristle | 30.167 | Squish 1.439 |
| Stairwell | Hard | Old Gristle | 31.733 | Chunk 1.466 |
| Carpet Flat | Carpet | Old Gristle | 33.194 | Slapper 1.289 |
| Tight Curve | Carpet | Old Gristle | 35.233 | Slapper 1.777 |
| The Hairpin | Smooth | Old Gristle | 41.322 | The Coaster 5.361 |
| Stairwell | Hard | Old Gristle | 44.672 | Slapper 3.139 |
| Fabric Run | Soft fabric | Old Gristle | 46.661 | Lil Nugget 1.783 |
| The Drops | Hard | Old Gristle | 48.494 | Slapper 1.634 |
| Carpet Flat | Carpet | Old Gristle | 50.628 | Slapper 1.983 |
| Fabric Run | Soft fabric | Old Gristle | 52.033 | Slapper 1.295 |
| Sweeping Curve | Carpet | Old Gristle | 54.228 | Slapper 2.138 |
| The Kicker | Smooth | Old Gristle | 55.839 | Chunk 1.328 |
| Carpet Flat | Carpet | The Coaster | 57.611 | Slapper 1.600 |
| The Spiral | Metal | The Coaster | 58.611 | Lil Nugget 0.606 |
| Laundry Chute | Soft fabric | Old Gristle | 1:10.611 | Squish 2.811 |
| Rotating Drum | Metal | Old Gristle | 1:14.056 | The Coaster 1.184 |
| Narrow Pipe | Metal | The Coaster | 1:13.794 | The Coaster 1.188 |
| The Drops | Metal | The Coaster | 1:14.872 | The Coaster 1.078 |
| Peg Field | Hard | The Coaster | 1:15.922 | The Coaster 1.050 |
| The Pinball Table | Slick | The Coaster | 1:17.500 | The Coaster 1.578 |
| Collision Funnel | Hard | The Coaster | 1:18.372 | The Coaster 0.872 |
| Smooth Descent | Hard | The Coaster | 1:19.917 | The Coaster 1.545 |
| Barrier Run | Smooth | The Coaster | 1:21.222 | The Coaster 1.305 |
| Sweeping Curve | Smooth | The Coaster | 1:23.150 | Slapper 1.867 |
| Bounce Pads | Smooth | The Coaster | 1:24.683 | The Coaster 1.533 |
| S-Bend | Smooth | The Coaster | 1:28.561 | Slapper 3.511 |
| Tight Curve | Smooth | The Coaster | 1:33.772 | Chunk 3.028 |
| The Funnel | Smooth | The Coaster | 1:36.022 | Chunk 2.172 |
| Narrow Pipe | Metal | The Coaster | 1:38.433 | Crooked Pete 2.194 |
| The Gauntlet | Smooth | The Coaster | 1:41.989 | Chunk 1.989 |
| The Hairpin | Smooth | The Coaster | 1:45.917 | Slapper 3.639 |
| Split Route | Smooth | The Coaster | 1:48.850 | Custard 2.622 |
| Sweeping Curve | Carpet | The Coaster | 1:53.050 | Chunk 3.945 |
| Final Sprint | Carpet | The Coaster | 1:55.800 | Slapper 2.739 |
| Target Zone | Carpet | The Coaster | 2:00.072 | Old Gristle 1.206 |
| Exit Gate | Carpet | The Coaster | 2:02.444 | Old Gristle 1.072 |
| # | Team | Score | Finishers | Points |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| 1 | The Pucks | 3 | 0/2 | 8 |
| 2 | Lump Patrol | 7 | 1/2 | 7 |
| 3 | The Nuggets | 12 | 2/2 | 6 |
| 4 | The Soft Boys | 14 | 2/2 | 5 |
| 5 | The Wet Socks | 24 | 2/2 | 4 |
| 6 | The Noodles | 25 | 1/2 | 3 |
| 7 | The Beans | 25 | 2/2 | 2 |
| 8 | Basement Heat | 26 | 2/2 | 1 |
Pack races score the sum of a team's best three finishing positions. Lower is better.
Race card
16 declared3
Crooked Pete
The Noodles · HOME
227 starts, 0 wins, average finish 6.8. Last five: 7-3-7-6-10.
35.18
44
Old Gristle
Lump Patrol · HOME
226 starts, 54 wins, average finish 4.1. Last five: 2-3-7-13-1.
6.44
Course preview
45 sections · 659 m
Starting Ramp
Carpet
8m
↓24°
Smooth Descent
Carpet
20m
↓15°
Sweeping Curve
Carpet
16m
↓13°
Smooth Descent
Carpet
16m
↓15°
The Drops
Carpet
14m
↓32°
The Spiral
Metal
26m
↓19°
Laundry Chute
Soft fabric
18m
↓35°
Rotating Drum
Metal
12m
↓9°
Narrow Pipe
Metal
13m
↓18°
The Drops
Metal
14m
↓32°
Stairwell
Hard
16m
↓31°
Carpet Flat
Carpet
14m
↓10°
Tight Curve
Carpet
11m
↓12°
The Hairpin
Smooth
14m
↓16°
Stairwell
Hard
16m
↓31°
Fabric Run
Soft fabric
12m
↓11°
The Drops
Hard
14m
↓32°
Carpet Flat
Carpet
18m
↓10°
Fabric Run
Soft fabric
12m
↓11°
Sweeping Curve
Carpet
16m
↓13°
The Kicker
Smooth
9m
↓11°
Carpet Flat
Carpet
14m
↓10°
The Spiral
Metal
26m
↓19°
Laundry Chute
Soft fabric
18m
↓35°
Rotating Drum
Metal
12m
↓9°
Narrow Pipe
Metal
13m
↓18°
The Drops
Metal
14m
↓32°
Peg Field
Hard
14m
↓32°
The Pinball Table
Slick
20m
↓14°
Collision Funnel
Hard
10m
↓16°
Smooth Descent
Hard
16m
↓15°
Barrier Run
Smooth
14m
↓22°
Sweeping Curve
Smooth
16m
↓13°
Bounce Pads
Smooth
14m
↓22°
S-Bend
Smooth
18m
↓12°
Tight Curve
Smooth
11m
↓12°
The Funnel
Smooth
11m
↓17°
Narrow Pipe
Metal
13m
↓18°
The Gauntlet
Smooth
17m
↓22°
The Hairpin
Smooth
14m
↓16°
Split Route
Smooth
16m
↓22°
Sweeping Curve
Carpet
16m
↓13°
Final Sprint
Carpet
18m
↓16°
Target Zone
Carpet
8m
↓5°
Exit Gate
Carpet
7m
↓8°
Two full spiral banister descents, run as a pack, and rarely tidy. The rail is the original, waxed once a season by somebody the league declines to name, and the field is told every year that this is fine.
On the record
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