Derby · Season 1 · Round 37
Washboard Ring — Team Pack Race
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Fairness
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Carnage — Old Gristle survives to win
Old Gristle took Washboard Ring — Team Pack Race for the Lump Patrol. Wide Load finished second. 11 competitors failed to finish. Lump Patrol took the team honours.
| # | Competitor | Team | Time | Gap | Grid | +/- | Contacts | Top speed |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| 1 | Old Gristle | Lump Patrol | 3:25.217 | — | 12 | +11 | 43 | 12.6 |
| 2 | Wide Load | The Pucks | 3:28.825 | +3.61 | 14 | +12 | 42 | 12.3 |
| 3 | Thick Rick | The Nuggets | 3:45.058 | +19.84 | 9 | +6 | 64 | 11.5 |
| 4 | Long John | The Noodles | 3:49.567 | +24.35 | 1 | -3 | 55 | 10.7 |
| 5 | Tube Sock | The Wet Socks | 3:50.250 | +25.03 | 4 | -1 | 48 | 10.9 |
| — | Gravy WRECKED | Lump Patrol | — | — | 11 | +5 | 49 | 11.6 |
| — | Lil Nugget WRECKED | The Nuggets | — | — | 10 | +3 | 27 | 11.1 |
| — | Slapper WRECKED | The Pucks | — | — | 13 | +5 | 24 | 12.4 |
| — | Damp Kevin RUNNING | The Wet Socks | — | — | 3 | -6 | 16 | 10.5 |
| — | Squish WRECKED | The Soft Boys | — | — | 15 | +5 | 17 | 11.2 |
| — | Crawlspace WRECKED | Basement Heat | — | — | 7 | -4 | 20 | 10.7 |
| — | The Kidney WRECKED | The Beans | — | — | 5 | -7 | 23 | 9.9 |
| — | Crooked Pete WRECKED | The Noodles | — | — | 2 | -11 | 13 | 10.1 |
| — | Sweaty Gerald WRECKED | The Beans | — | — | 6 | -8 | 22 | 10.4 |
| — | Tender Greg WRECKED | The Soft Boys | — | — | 16 | +1 | 9 | 11.3 |
| — | Pilot Light WRECKED | Basement Heat | — | — | 8 | -8 | 11 | 10.3 |
1.833
There is nothing left of it. Recent finishes: 8-8-5-10-5.
6.150
And it all goes wrong. Recent finishes: 2-4-1-2-3.
13.500
There goes a piece of Pilot Light. Recent finishes: 5-14-4-16-8.
19.450
A new leader — Old Gristle.
23.667
Extraordinary scenes.
27.767
Tender Greg is out, and Tube Sock did it. Recent finishes: 3-6-4-4-9.
29.267
Sweaty Gerald has put Pilot Light out. Recent finishes: 5-14-4-16-8.
37.758
Up it goes.
43.908
Sweaty Gerald leaves something behind.
48.525
Old Gristle is airborne!
53.750
Tube Sock has put Crooked Pete out.
55.250
That is Tube Sock taking Sweaty Gerald with them.
56.750
Tube Sock has put Crawlspace out.
58.250
The Kidney will not be back.
1:00.892
Squish will not be back.
1:05.117
And it all goes wrong.
1:11.792
Lil Nugget is losing bits.
1:16.467
Absolute carnage.
1:24.350
Look at the state of it.
1:30.050
That was always going to happen.
1:31.550
Slapper is out.
1:38.658
Lil Nugget is airborne!
1:43.050
Wrecked, and out of the race.
1:55.850
Gravy is losing bits.
2:01.958
Stopped, and in the way.
2:08.050
Look at the state of it.
2:19.458
That has come off.
2:26.150
Extraordinary scenes.
2:33.167
Oh, that is a big one.
2:39.817
There goes a piece of Old Gristle.
2:45.475
Gravy has nothing left on it.
2:51.033
Somebody is going to have to sweep that up.
2:56.917
Oh, that is a big one.
2:58.417
Gravy will not be back.
3:02.817
This is the last of it.
3:08.125
Wide Load is airborne!
3:18.625
They will not want to see that again.
3:22.217
Old Gristle has it.
3:23.142
That was always going to happen.
3:25.217
Old Gristle wins the derby.
3:44.450
Thick Rick leaves something behind.
| Section | Surface | Leader at exit | Elapsed | Fastest through |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| Smooth Descent | Clay | Wide Load | 21.208 | Wide Load 21.208 |
| Smooth Descent | Clay | Wide Load | 43.708 | Gravy 21.350 |
| Smooth Descent | Clay | Wide Load | 1:06.867 | Lil Nugget 22.192 |
| Smooth Descent | Clay | Old Gristle | 1:27.383 | Old Gristle 20.300 |
| Smooth Descent | Clay | Old Gristle | 1:49.525 | Gravy 21.217 |
| Smooth Descent | Clay | Old Gristle | 2:15.633 | Tube Sock 24.375 |
| Smooth Descent | Clay | Old Gristle | 2:40.200 | Thick Rick 21.741 |
| Smooth Descent | Clay | Old Gristle | 3:02.817 | Thick Rick 22.492 |
| Smooth Descent | Clay | Old Gristle | 3:25.217 | Wide Load 20.492 |
| # | Team | Score | Finishers | Points |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| 1 | Lump Patrol | 7 | 1/2 | 8 |
| 2 | The Pucks | 10 | 1/2 | 7 |
| 3 | The Nuggets | 10 | 1/2 | 6 |
| 4 | The Wet Socks | 14 | 1/2 | 5 |
| 5 | The Noodles | 17 | 1/2 | 4 |
| 6 | The Soft Boys | 25 | 0/2 | 3 |
| 7 | The Beans | 26 | 0/2 | 2 |
| 8 | Basement Heat | 27 | 0/2 | 1 |
Pack races score the sum of a team's best three finishing positions. Lower is better.
Race card
16 declared9
Pilot Light
Basement Heat
13 starts, 0 wins, average finish 12.6. Last five: 13-15-12-9-14.
219.30
6
Tender Greg
The Soft Boys
15 starts, 0 wins, average finish 14.3. Last five: 15-10-16-16-16.
219.30
Course preview
6 sections · 135 m
Smooth Descent
Smooth
8m
↓15°
Smooth Descent
Smooth
14m
↓15°
Smooth Descent
Smooth
8m
↓15°
Smooth Descent
Smooth
38m
↓15°
Smooth Descent
Smooth
30m
↓15°
Smooth Descent
Smooth
38m
↓15°
Fourteen metres of corrugated deck plate laid across the main straight, crossed nine times a race. Nobody is ever taken out by it and nobody ever finishes intact — it does not wreck you, it disassembles you, one rivet at a time, and hands the pieces back at the flag. By the last lap the difference between a finisher and a heap of parts is simply who crossed it more cleanly. The stand sells earplugs at the gate; the noise is not a side effect, it is the attraction.
On the record
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