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Derby · Season 3 · Round 47

The Crucible

Crossbones Field · The Crucible · 161 m · 16 competitors Crossing traffic Track furniture Uphill section Steep banking
CHAMPIONSHIP FULL TIME Fairness
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Carnage — The Heel survives to win

The Heel took The Crucible for the The Wet Socks. Long John finished second. 13 competitors failed to finish. The Wet Socks took the team honours.

#CompetitorTeamTimeGap Grid+/-ContactsTop speed
1 The Heel WET The Wet Socks 3:42.942 — 3 +2 26 10.6
2 Long John NOO The Noodles 3:46.000 +3.06 1 -1 25 10.7
3 Tube Sock WET The Wet Socks 3:49.467 +6.53 4 +1 30 10.4
— Honey Mustard RUNNING NUG The Nuggets — — 9 +5 38 11.3
— Gravy WRECKED LMP Lump Patrol — — 12 +7 33 10.5
— The Kidney WRECKED BEA The Beans — — 5 -1 20 10.7
— The Coaster WRECKED PCK The Pucks — — 13 +6 25 11.8
— Squish WRECKED SFT The Soft Boys — — 15 +7 23 11.0
— Old Gristle RUNNING LMP Lump Patrol — — 11 +2 20 11.2
— Refried Ron WRECKED BEA The Beans — — 6 -4 13 10.2
— Lil Nugget RUNNING NUG The Nuggets — — 10 -1 18 11.0
— Floppy Joe WRECKED NOO The Noodles — — 2 -10 13 10.2
— Radiator WRECKED HEA Basement Heat — — 8 -5 12 10.2
— Yolk WRECKED SFT The Soft Boys — — 16 +2 9 11.5
— The Unit RUNNING HEA Basement Heat — — 7 -8 8 10.2
— Puck Yeah RUNNING PCK The Pucks — — 14 -2 10 10.7
2.542
There goes a piece of Honey Mustard. Recent finishes: 4-1-2-1-3.
7.150
Radiator takes the lead.
12.100
Yolk is losing bits.
16.842
They will not want to see that again.
23.900
Yolk takes the lead.
28.233
That has come off.
32.683
That is a long way off the ground.
38.742
Oh, that is a big one.
43.033
The Coaster is losing bits.
47.333
Puck Yeah leaves something behind.
52.700
A new leader — Old Gristle.
56.900
Yolk goes to the front.
1:01.258
That is a long way off the ground.
1:07.042
Yolk is out, and Squish did it. Recent finishes: 5-6-6-13-3.
1:11.308
That is real damage.
1:15.992
Radiator will not be back.
1:21.492
Old Gristle has put Floppy Joe out.
1:25.942
The Kidney leaves something behind.
1:30.417
That has come off. Recent finishes: 4-1-2-1-3.
1:35.325
Squish will not take much more.
1:39.808
They felt that in the back row.
1:43.783
Refried Ron is out, and The Coaster did it. Recent finishes: 15-4-8-7-15.
1:48.017
Wrecked, and out of the race. Recent finishes: 2-6-15-3-4.
1:56.233
They will not want to see that again.
2:01.758
That was always going to happen.
2:03.625
And that is The Coaster finished.
2:14.033
They will not want to see that again.
2:20.983
Gravy is airborne!
2:22.558
The Kidney is out, and Tube Sock did it.
2:31.092
And that is Gravy finished.
2:37.250
The Heel goes to the front.
2:41.450
Tube Sock takes the lead.
2:50.950
The Heel leaves something behind.
3:07.633
Beautiful. Just beautiful.
3:17.283
One to go.
3:21.942
They felt that in the back row.
3:31.533
That is real damage.
3:39.942
Here comes The Heel.
3:42.942
It is The Heel!
SectionSurfaceLeader at exitElapsedFastest through
Smooth Descent Clay Yolk 25.575 Yolk 25.575
Smooth Descent Clay Old Gristle 52.692 Old Gristle 26.384
Smooth Descent Clay Squish 1:21.225 Squish 27.117
Smooth Descent Clay Long John 1:51.775 Gravy 27.383
Smooth Descent Clay Long John 2:20.633 Tube Sock 26.533
Smooth Descent Clay Tube Sock 2:49.633 Tube Sock 27.133
Smooth Descent Clay The Heel 3:17.283 The Heel 27.158
Smooth Descent Clay The Heel 3:42.942 The Heel 25.659
#TeamScoreFinishersPoints
1 WET The Wet Socks 4 2/2 16
2 NOO The Noodles 14 1/2 14
3 LMP Lump Patrol 14 0/2 12
4 NUG The Nuggets 15 0/2 10
5 BEA The Beans 16 0/2 8
6 SFT The Soft Boys 22 0/2 6
7 PCK The Pucks 23 0/2 4
8 HEA Basement Heat 28 0/2 2
Pack races score the sum of a team's best three finishing positions. Lower is better.

Race card

16 declared
7
Long John The Noodles
62 starts, 4 wins, average finish 5.2. Last five: 3-8-1-2-9.
2.67
12
Floppy Joe The Noodles
60 starts, 4 wins, average finish 7.9. Last five: 2-15-4-4-15.
47.88
9
The Heel The Wet Socks
54 starts, 5 wins, average finish 5.6. Last five: 3-12-4-3-10.
10.85
11
Tube Sock The Wet Socks
69 starts, 8 wins, average finish 4.5. Last five: 6-4-3-1-8.
3.25
6
The Kidney The Beans
62 starts, 0 wins, average finish 10.3. Last five: 9-16-4-9-12.
188.41
5
Refried Ron The Beans
59 starts, 0 wins, average finish 13.0. Last five: 13-13-16-13-15.
219.30
1
The Unit Basement Heat
60 starts, 2 wins, average finish 7.0. Last five: 8-13-7-6-7.
16.56
4
Radiator Basement Heat
77 starts, 0 wins, average finish 13.1. Last five: 13-13-14-14-16.
219.30
2
Honey Mustard The Nuggets
61 starts, 1 win, average finish 7.7. Last five: 6-14-11-2-2.
23.36
0
Lil Nugget The Nuggets
70 starts, 1 win, average finish 8.9. Last five: 7-8-10-14-9.
80.39
44
Old Gristle Lump Patrol
77 starts, 20 wins, average finish 4.8. Last five: 5-1-7-2-2.
5.86
17
Gravy Lump Patrol
70 starts, 10 wins, average finish 7.1. Last five: 4-9-2-1-9.
25.03
3
The Coaster The Pucks
69 starts, 8 wins, average finish 8.4. Last five: 15-6-15-3-1.
104.71
69
Puck Yeah The Pucks
68 starts, 2 wins, average finish 12.2. Last five: 15-8-11-15-11.
219.30
2
Squish The Soft Boys
66 starts, 0 wins, average finish 11.4. Last five: 14-7-12-9-14.
219.30
0
Yolk The Soft Boys
62 starts, 0 wins, average finish 14.2. Last five: 14-15-12-14-14.
219.30

Course preview

9 sections · 161 m
Smooth Descent Smooth
7m ↓15°
Smooth Descent Smooth
10m ↓15°
Smooth Descent Smooth
4m ↓11°
Smooth Descent Smooth
4m ↑11°
Smooth Descent Smooth
57m ↓15°
Smooth Descent Smooth
7m ↓15°
Smooth Descent Smooth
10m ↓15°
Smooth Descent Smooth
7m ↓15°
Smooth Descent Smooth
57m ↓15°

Crossbones with a hill cut into the approach — the two nastiest ideas in the sport bolted together on purpose. Eight laps, a junction taken twice a lap, and a climb a damaged Chunkle simply does not get up. This is the championship, and it has never once been won by anything still wearing half its rind. They present the trophy at the top of the hill, which most of the field never reaches, and the engraver is kept on standby because the winner is rarely in a fit state to spell its own name.

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