Derby · Season 4 · Round 47
The Crucible
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Carnage — Damp Kevin survives to win
Damp Kevin took The Crucible for the The Wet Socks. Long John finished second. 12 competitors failed to finish. The Wet Socks took the team honours.
| # | Competitor | Team | Time | Gap | Grid | +/- | Contacts | Top speed |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| 1 | Damp Kevin | The Wet Socks | 3:43.117 | — | 3 | +2 | 21 | 10.4 |
| 2 | Long John | The Noodles | 3:49.575 | +6.46 | 1 | -1 | 23 | 10.6 |
| 3 | Wide Load | The Pucks | 3:55.175 | +12.06 | 14 | +11 | 40 | 11.7 |
| 4 | Old Gristle | Lump Patrol | 3:58.383 | +15.27 | 12 | +8 | 42 | 11.2 |
| — | The Unit RUNNING | Basement Heat | — | — | 8 | +3 | 28 | 10.8 |
| — | The Heel WRECKED | The Wet Socks | — | — | 4 | -2 | 19 | 10.9 |
| — | Chunk WRECKED | Lump Patrol | — | — | 11 | +4 | 31 | 10.4 |
| — | The Coaster WRECKED | The Pucks | — | — | 13 | +5 | 25 | 11.7 |
| — | Sweaty Gerald WRECKED | The Beans | — | — | 5 | -4 | 21 | 10.1 |
| — | Lil Nugget WRECKED | The Nuggets | — | — | 10 | 0 | 24 | 11.0 |
| — | Floppy Joe WRECKED | The Noodles | — | — | 2 | -9 | 13 | 10.2 |
| — | Squish RUNNING | The Soft Boys | — | — | 15 | +3 | 18 | 10.8 |
| — | Radiator WRECKED | Basement Heat | — | — | 7 | -6 | 13 | 10.3 |
| — | Thick Rick RUNNING | The Nuggets | — | — | 9 | -5 | 14 | 11.0 |
| — | Refried Ron WRECKED | The Beans | — | — | 6 | -9 | 11 | 10.4 |
| — | Tender Greg WRECKED | The Soft Boys | — | — | 16 | 0 | 10 | 10.9 |
2.558
Somebody is going to have to sweep that up.
7.425
Up it goes. Recent finishes: 1-1-2-4-1.
12.125
There goes a piece of Tender Greg.
16.725
That has come off. Recent finishes: 8-14-8-6-3.
22.158
Tender Greg is losing bits.
26.608
That has come off. Recent finishes: 12-5-15-6-7.
30.833
Look at the state of it. Recent finishes: 4-5-8-7-7.
35.425
There goes a piece of Floppy Joe. Recent finishes: 7-7-5-9-8.
40.050
Damp Kevin is coming through.
44.292
That was always going to happen.
48.825
The Unit is airborne!
54.058
Radiator is losing bits.
55.558
Tender Greg will not be back.
1:00.050
Oh, that is a big one.
1:07.467
Extraordinary scenes.
1:12.392
It is coming apart now.
1:14.642
The Unit has put Refried Ron out.
1:19.075
Oh, that is a big one.
1:23.275
Thick Rick has stalled.
1:25.167
Wrecked, and out of the race.
1:30.050
They felt that in the back row.
1:34.708
That is a long way off the ground.
1:36.742
That is Chunk taking Floppy Joe with them.
1:43.558
Oh, that is a big one.
1:48.075
There is nothing protecting Lil Nugget now.
1:54.267
Damp Kevin is airborne!
1:59.833
And that is Lil Nugget finished.
2:04.425
The Heel is losing bits.
2:06.508
Wrecked, and out of the race.
2:12.358
There is nothing protecting Sweaty Gerald now.
2:16.792
And that is Sweaty Gerald finished.
2:23.725
That is a long way off the ground.
2:25.550
Wrecked, and out of the race.
2:31.817
And it all goes wrong.
2:43.725
They felt that in the back row.
2:46.292
The Heel is out, and Damp Kevin did it.
2:54.183
That has come off.
3:01.625
Wide Load leaves something behind.
3:10.000
The Unit is going nowhere.
3:15.025
One to go.
3:24.425
Long John is airborne!
3:30.875
Look at the state of it.
3:40.117
Damp Kevin is coming to the flag.
3:43.117
It is Damp Kevin!
3:52.142
Absolute carnage.
| Section | Surface | Leader at exit | Elapsed | Fastest through |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| Smooth Descent | Clay | Chunk | 25.850 | Chunk 25.850 |
| Smooth Descent | Clay | Tender Greg | 52.367 | Tender Greg 25.517 |
| Smooth Descent | Clay | The Coaster | 1:20.092 | The Coaster 26.484 |
| Smooth Descent | Clay | The Coaster | 1:47.908 | Lil Nugget 25.500 |
| Smooth Descent | Clay | The Heel | 2:17.642 | The Heel 27.284 |
| Smooth Descent | Clay | Damp Kevin | 2:46.808 | The Unit 27.717 |
| Smooth Descent | Clay | Damp Kevin | 3:15.025 | Damp Kevin 28.217 |
| Smooth Descent | Clay | Damp Kevin | 3:43.117 | Wide Load 26.708 |
| # | Team | Score | Finishers | Points |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| 1 | The Wet Socks | 7 | 1/2 | 16 |
| 2 | The Pucks | 11 | 1/2 | 14 |
| 3 | Lump Patrol | 11 | 1/2 | 12 |
| 4 | The Noodles | 13 | 1/2 | 10 |
| 5 | Basement Heat | 18 | 0/2 | 8 |
| 6 | The Beans | 24 | 0/2 | 6 |
| 7 | The Nuggets | 24 | 0/2 | 4 |
| 8 | The Soft Boys | 28 | 0/2 | 2 |
Pack races score the sum of a team's best three finishing positions. Lower is better.
Race card
16 declared6
Tender Greg
The Soft Boys
97 starts, 0 wins, average finish 14.8. Last five: 16-16-16-11-16.
219.30
Course preview
9 sections · 161 m
Smooth Descent
Smooth
7m
↓15°
Smooth Descent
Smooth
10m
↓15°
Smooth Descent
Smooth
4m
↓11°
Smooth Descent
Smooth
4m
↑11°
Smooth Descent
Smooth
57m
↓15°
Smooth Descent
Smooth
7m
↓15°
Smooth Descent
Smooth
10m
↓15°
Smooth Descent
Smooth
7m
↓15°
Smooth Descent
Smooth
57m
↓15°
Crossbones with a hill cut into the approach — the two nastiest ideas in the sport bolted together on purpose. Eight laps, a junction taken twice a lap, and a climb a damaged Chunkle simply does not get up. This is the championship, and it has never once been won by anything still wearing half its rind. They present the trophy at the top of the hill, which most of the field never reaches, and the engraver is kept on standby because the winner is rarely in a fit state to spell its own name.
On the record
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