Paper Mogul Sports
Derby · Season 10 · Round 17

Washboard Ring — Team Pack Race

Washboard Yard · Washboard Ring · 135 m · 16 competitors Steep banking
FULL TIME Fairness
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Carnage — The Lieutenant survives to win

The Lieutenant took Washboard Ring — Team Pack Race for the Lump Patrol. Old Gristle finished second. 9 competitors failed to finish. Lump Patrol took the team honours.

#CompetitorTeamTimeGap Grid+/-ContactsTop speed
1 The Lieutenant LMP Lump Patrol 3:27.225 11 +10 32 11.7
2 Old Gristle LMP Lump Patrol 3:33.517 +6.29 12 +10 35 11.6
3 Tube Sock WET The Wet Socks 3:44.200 +16.98 3 0 52 10.9
4 The Unit HEA Basement Heat 3:49.642 +22.42 8 +4 53 10.6
5 Butter Bean BEA The Beans 3:51.667 +24.44 5 0 56 11.1
6 Thick Rick NUG The Nuggets 3:52.183 +24.96 10 +4 62 12.1
7 Long John NOO The Noodles 3:53.675 +26.45 1 -6 67 11.0
The Coaster FELL PCK The Pucks 13 +5 22 15.2
Honey Mustard WRECKED NUG The Nuggets 9 0 26 11.8
Puck Yeah WRECKED PCK The Pucks 14 +4 20 11.8
Crawlspace WRECKED HEA Basement Heat 7 -4 21 10.2
The Heel WRECKED WET The Wet Socks 4 -8 17 9.9
Sweaty Gerald WRECKED BEA The Beans 6 -7 17 10.6
Yolk WRECKED SFT The Soft Boys 16 +2 10 10.6
Squish WRECKED SFT The Soft Boys 15 0 14 11.0
Crooked Pete WRECKED NOO The Noodles 2 -14 13 10.9
1.833
They felt that in the back row. Recent finishes: 6-16-8-7-11.
6.150
And it all goes wrong.
10.833
That is a long way off the ground. Recent finishes: 1-1-2-6-14.
15.575
You do not see that every day.
19.983
Honey Mustard leaves something behind. Recent finishes: 3-2-4-3-16.
24.567
The Heel is losing bits.
29.050
Honey Mustard takes the lead. Career record: 24 wins from 292, average finish 4.6.
32.233
That is Tube Sock taking Crooked Pete with them.
38.058
Up it goes. Recent finishes: 1-1-2-6-14.
39.875
The Heel has put Squish out.
45.225
Absolute carnage.
49.583
Puck Yeah has put Yolk out.
53.792
That is Crawlspace taking Sweaty Gerald with them.
59.383
The Heel is out.
1:04.183
Extraordinary scenes.
1:10.050
Old Gristle is coming through.
1:15.667
Puck Yeah will not take much more.
1:17.292
Puck Yeah will not be back.
1:19.783
Crawlspace is out, and Thick Rick did it.
1:24.367
Beautiful. Just beautiful.
1:27.183
Honey Mustard is out.
1:33.383
Absolute carnage.
1:39.992
The Coaster is over the boards.
1:45.817
Long John leaves something behind.
2:05.308
Up it goes.
2:15.950
Old Gristle goes to the front.
2:23.533
Oh, that is a big one.
2:28.742
Beautiful. Just beautiful.
2:38.092
Old Gristle is airborne!
2:50.542
You do not see that every day.
2:56.783
There goes a piece of The Unit.
3:02.825
There goes a piece of The Unit.
3:07.925
Last lap.
3:14.850
That is a long way off the ground.
3:24.092
There goes a piece of The Unit.
3:24.225
The Lieutenant has it.
3:27.225
It is The Lieutenant!
3:37.808
Thick Rick is airborne!
SectionSurfaceLeader at exitElapsedFastest through
Smooth Descent Clay Honey Mustard 20.575 Honey Mustard 20.575
Smooth Descent Clay Honey Mustard 45.350 The Lieutenant 22.217
Smooth Descent Clay Honey Mustard 1:08.933 Old Gristle 20.800
Smooth Descent Clay The Lieutenant 1:32.400 The Lieutenant 22.117
Smooth Descent Clay The Lieutenant 1:58.892 Butter Bean 24.675
Smooth Descent Clay Old Gristle 2:21.258 Old Gristle 21.400
Smooth Descent Clay Old Gristle 2:45.783 The Lieutenant 22.816
Smooth Descent Clay Old Gristle 3:07.925 Old Gristle 22.142
Smooth Descent Clay The Lieutenant 3:27.225 The Lieutenant 17.125
#TeamScoreFinishersPoints
1 LMP Lump Patrol 3 2/2 8
2 WET The Wet Socks 15 1/2 7
3 HEA Basement Heat 15 1/2 6
4 NUG The Nuggets 15 1/2 5
5 BEA The Beans 18 1/2 4
6 PCK The Pucks 18 0/2 3
7 NOO The Noodles 23 1/2 2
8 SFT The Soft Boys 29 0/2 1
Pack races score the sum of a team's best three finishing positions. Lower is better.

Race card

16 declared
7
Long John The Noodles
238 starts, 9 wins, average finish 5.6. Last five: 7-8-4-3-8.
12.86
3
Crooked Pete The Noodles
221 starts, 6 wins, average finish 8.8. Last five: 11-14-3-8-7.
219.30
11
Tube Sock The Wet Socks
225 starts, 29 wins, average finish 4.2. Last five: 3-2-2-2-1.
2.50
9
The Heel The Wet Socks
208 starts, 20 wins, average finish 5.5. Last five: 1-5-5-10-8.
27.01
22
Butter Bean The Beans
233 starts, 1 win, average finish 8.7. Last five: 12-10-14-4-4.
74.48
8
Sweaty Gerald The Beans
221 starts, 0 wins, average finish 11.0. Last five: 10-10-8-13-16.
219.30
13
Crawlspace Basement Heat
226 starts, 1 win, average finish 8.6. Last five: 13-12-9-12-9.
217.11
1
The Unit Basement Heat
221 starts, 4 wins, average finish 7.6. Last five: 12-7-6-3-8.
26.71
2
Honey Mustard The Nuggets
231 starts, 8 wins, average finish 8.0. Last five: 4-14-3-14-11.
92.07
33
Thick Rick The Nuggets
221 starts, 6 wins, average finish 7.3. Last five: 5-7-4-2-5.
16.16
10
The Lieutenant Lump Patrol
233 starts, 50 wins, average finish 5.1. Last five: 6-2-6-10-3.
4.71
44
Old Gristle Lump Patrol
236 starts, 58 wins, average finish 4.9. Last five: 2-2-15-2-4.
3.96
3
The Coaster The Pucks
227 starts, 22 wins, average finish 7.6. Last five: 3-8-7-1-11.
37.40
69
Puck Yeah The Pucks
220 starts, 6 wins, average finish 12.3. Last five: 13-11-12-16-13.
219.30
2
Squish The Soft Boys
226 starts, 1 win, average finish 10.8. Last five: 14-15-11-14-8.
219.30
0
Yolk The Soft Boys
223 starts, 0 wins, average finish 14.3. Last five: 14-16-10-16-16.
219.30

Course preview

6 sections · 135 m
Smooth Descent Smooth
8m ↓15°
Smooth Descent Smooth
14m ↓15°
Smooth Descent Smooth
8m ↓15°
Smooth Descent Smooth
38m ↓15°
Smooth Descent Smooth
30m ↓15°
Smooth Descent Smooth
38m ↓15°

Fourteen metres of corrugated deck plate laid across the main straight, crossed nine times a race. Nobody is ever taken out by it and nobody ever finishes intact — it does not wreck you, it disassembles you, one rivet at a time, and hands the pieces back at the flag. By the last lap the difference between a finisher and a heap of parts is simply who crossed it more cleanly. The stand sells earplugs at the gate; the noise is not a side effect, it is the attraction.

On the record

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