Paper Mogul Sports
Derby · Season 10 · Round 40

The Long Mile — Team Pack Race

Long Mile Basin · The Long Mile · 161 m · 16 competitors Uphill section Steep banking
FULL TIME Fairness
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Carnage — Gravy survives to win

Gravy took The Long Mile — Team Pack Race for the Lump Patrol. Thick Rick finished second. 8 competitors failed to finish. The Pucks took the team honours.

#CompetitorTeamTimeGap Grid+/-ContactsTop speed
1 Gravy LMP Lump Patrol 3:42.058 12 +11 37 11.9
2 Thick Rick NUG The Nuggets 3:42.833 +0.78 9 +7 49 12.3
3 Slapper PCK The Pucks 3:43.717 +1.66 13 +10 31 12.1
4 Wide Load PCK The Pucks 3:43.958 +1.90 14 +10 37 12.0
5 Damp Kevin WET The Wet Socks 3:46.942 +4.88 4 -1 20 10.6
6 Tube Sock WET The Wet Socks 3:47.908 +5.85 3 -3 16 10.6
7 The Kidney BEA The Beans 3:57.175 +15.12 5 -2 22 10.9
8 The Unit HEA Basement Heat 4:00.133 +18.08 8 0 27 10.8
Chunk WRECKED LMP Lump Patrol 11 +2 29 12.5
Stubbs WRECKED NUG The Nuggets 10 0 33 11.8
Floppy Joe WRECKED NOO The Noodles 2 -9 13 10.6
Crooked Pete WRECKED NOO The Noodles 1 -11 13 10.3
Squish WRECKED SFT The Soft Boys 15 +2 20 11.3
Pilot Light WRECKED HEA Basement Heat 7 -7 12 10.1
Refried Ron WRECKED BEA The Beans 6 -9 13 10.8
Tender Greg WRECKED SFT The Soft Boys 16 0 10 11.3
3.950
A new leader — Tender Greg. Career record: 1 wins from 302, average finish 5.7.
10.050
Look at Tender Greg go. Recent finishes: 8-4-4-4-6.
15.508
The Kidney is airborne!
20.050
Look at Squish go.
25.700
They will not want to see that again. Recent finishes: 3-4-9-2-11.
30.050
It is unravelling for Refried Ron.
35.725
Absolute carnage.
40.050
Look at Gravy go.
49.275
That is a long way off the ground. Recent finishes: 1-3-3-7-3.
54.042
They will not want to see that again.
1:00.050
Somebody is going to have to sweep that up.
1:04.925
That has come off. Recent finishes: 9-6-8-3-5.
1:10.050
Look at Tender Greg go.
1:15.025
That is Gravy taking Tender Greg with them.
1:20.050
Look at Slapper go.
1:24.508
There is nothing protecting Refried Ron now.
1:30.050
Chunk is on the move.
1:34.442
Up it goes.
1:38.658
Look at the state of it.
1:43.375
It is coming apart now.
1:47.708
That is Pilot Light taking Refried Ron with them.
1:49.208
Pilot Light is out.
1:53.833
Chunk leaves something behind.
1:55.333
Stubbs has put Squish out.
2:00.050
Extraordinary scenes.
2:04.950
Thick Rick is airborne!
2:10.075
That is real damage.
2:15.983
Look at the state of it.
2:20.808
Chunk is airborne!
2:22.308
Wrecked, and out of the race.
2:23.958
Floppy Joe will not be back.
2:28.375
That has come off.
2:32.592
Up it goes.
2:39.925
Up it goes.
2:44.625
They will not want to see that again.
2:50.050
Slapper is on the move.
2:54.408
That has come off.
2:59.092
There is nothing protecting Chunk now.
3:04.325
Wrecked, and out of the race.
3:09.258
That is a long way off the ground.
3:10.850
This is the last of it.
3:14.017
Chunk is out.
3:20.450
Slapper is airborne!
3:31.100
Absolute carnage.
3:36.508
Damp Kevin leaves something behind.
3:39.058
Gravy is coming to the flag.
3:42.058
Gravy wins the derby.
SectionSurfaceLeader at exitElapsedFastest through
Smooth Descent Clay Thick Rick 23.158 Thick Rick 23.158
Smooth Descent Clay Thick Rick 46.467 Thick Rick 23.309
Smooth Descent Clay Thick Rick 1:09.950 Wide Load 21.841
Smooth Descent Clay Wide Load 1:35.783 Wide Load 22.100
Smooth Descent Clay Thick Rick 2:01.667 Stubbs 20.758
Smooth Descent Clay Thick Rick 2:27.025 Gravy 21.050
Smooth Descent Clay Chunk 2:47.667 Chunk 19.267
Smooth Descent Clay Chunk 3:10.850 Chunk 23.183
#TeamScoreFinishersPoints
1 PCK The Pucks 7 2/2 8
2 LMP Lump Patrol 10 1/2 7
3 WET The Wet Socks 11 2/2 6
4 NUG The Nuggets 12 1/2 5
5 BEA The Beans 22 1/2 4
6 HEA Basement Heat 22 1/2 3
7 NOO The Noodles 23 0/2 2
8 SFT The Soft Boys 29 0/2 1
Pack races score the sum of a team's best three finishing positions. Lower is better.

Race card

16 declared
3
Crooked Pete The Noodles
227 starts, 6 wins, average finish 8.8. Last five: 7-2-16-4-9.
168.70
12
Floppy Joe The Noodles
235 starts, 9 wins, average finish 9.1. Last five: 13-3-15-11-2.
219.30
11
Tube Sock The Wet Socks
237 starts, 31 wins, average finish 4.2. Last five: 5-3-7-6-1.
2.70
4
Damp Kevin The Wet Socks
241 starts, 44 wins, average finish 3.8. Last five: 11-4-4-3-5.
3.20
6
The Kidney The Beans
236 starts, 0 wins, average finish 10.1. Last five: 15-8-13-9-12.
219.30
5
Refried Ron The Beans
234 starts, 0 wins, average finish 12.9. Last five: 9-15-12-13-16.
219.30
9
Pilot Light Basement Heat
219 starts, 0 wins, average finish 13.6. Last five: 13-12-15-14-15.
219.30
1
The Unit Basement Heat
235 starts, 4 wins, average finish 7.6. Last five: 10-11-5-8-14.
47.10
33
Thick Rick The Nuggets
234 starts, 6 wins, average finish 7.3. Last five: 10-10-8-7-4.
18.68
7
Stubbs The Nuggets
234 starts, 14 wins, average finish 7.8. Last five: 9-7-6-9-12.
22.85
5
Chunk Lump Patrol
201 starts, 6 wins, average finish 9.9. Last five: 11-5-13-10-7.
219.30
17
Gravy Lump Patrol
253 starts, 32 wins, average finish 7.0. Last five: 16-2-1-3-13.
20.02
8
Slapper The Pucks
224 starts, 24 wins, average finish 8.6. Last five: 8-3-12-11-12.
135.15
4
Wide Load The Pucks
253 starts, 53 wins, average finish 5.1. Last five: 8-1-11-5-2.
3.80
2
Squish The Soft Boys
236 starts, 1 win, average finish 10.8. Last five: 10-13-15-7-13.
219.30
6
Tender Greg The Soft Boys
240 starts, 1 win, average finish 14.5. Last five: 15-16-15-16-10.
219.30

Course preview

5 sections · 161 m
Smooth Descent Smooth
30m ↓15°
Smooth Descent Smooth
50m ↓15°
Smooth Descent Smooth
15m ↓13°
Smooth Descent Smooth
15m ↑13°
Smooth Descent Smooth
50m ↓15°

The endurance one, cut into the floor of an old quarry — the biggest lap on the calendar, with a real hill in the back straight that has to be climbed nine times. This is attrition rather than carnage: a Chunkle that has shed half its rind has also shed the momentum to get up the hill, and simply stops being a competitor somewhere on the slope. Races here are won by the patient and finished by almost nobody. The quarry has, everyone agrees, excellent natural acoustics for the sound of something giving up.

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