Paper Mogul Sports
Derby · Season 8 · Round 27

Washboard Ring — Team Pack Race

Washboard Yard · Washboard Ring · 135 m · 16 competitors Steep banking
FULL TIME Fairness
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Carnage — The Lieutenant survives to win

The Lieutenant took Washboard Ring — Team Pack Race for the Lump Patrol. Gravy finished second. 9 competitors failed to finish. Lump Patrol took the team honours.

#CompetitorTeamTimeGap Grid+/-ContactsTop speed
1 The Lieutenant LMP Lump Patrol 3:23.442 12 +11 37 12.3
2 Gravy LMP Lump Patrol 3:27.625 +4.18 11 +9 37 11.8
3 Wide Load PCK The Pucks 3:29.100 +5.66 13 +10 40 11.4
4 Thick Rick NUG The Nuggets 3:32.058 +8.62 9 +5 49 11.8
5 Stubbs NUG The Nuggets 3:34.675 +11.23 10 +5 45 12.1
6 Tube Sock WET The Wet Socks 3:44.500 +21.06 4 -2 52 10.6
7 Damp Kevin WET The Wet Socks 3:46.742 +23.30 3 -4 61 10.7
Slapper WRECKED PCK The Pucks 14 +6 21 11.7
Big Randy WRECKED NOO The Noodles 1 -8 20 10.5
Crawlspace WRECKED HEA Basement Heat 8 -2 25 10.8
Custard WRECKED SFT The Soft Boys 15 +4 27 11.0
Sweaty Gerald WRECKED BEA The Beans 5 -7 21 10.3
Yolk WRECKED SFT The Soft Boys 16 +3 12 11.0
Refried Ron WRECKED BEA The Beans 6 -8 12 9.3
Floppy Joe WRECKED NOO The Noodles 2 -13 13 9.5
Pilot Light WRECKED HEA Basement Heat 7 -9 11 10.4
1.592
Extraordinary scenes. Recent finishes: 4-4-12-3-4.
5.992
The Lieutenant is airborne!
12.583
There goes a piece of Yolk. Recent finishes: 4-6-3-7-4.
16.900
That is a long way off the ground. Recent finishes: 3-3-5-3-3.
23.842
There goes a piece of Custard.
28.267
There is nothing protecting Pilot Light now. Recent finishes: 8-4-8-8-7.
30.858
Damp Kevin has put Pilot Light out.
33.233
Floppy Joe is out, and Sweaty Gerald did it. Recent finishes: 7-11-8-4-6.
36.558
That is Damp Kevin taking Refried Ron with them.
40.825
There is nothing protecting Yolk now.
47.550
That is real damage.
49.050
Slapper has put Yolk out.
53.617
Sweaty Gerald is losing bits.
58.950
That was always going to happen.
1:04.617
There goes a piece of Crawlspace.
1:10.050
Beautiful. Just beautiful.
1:14.400
Stripped to the shell.
1:18.967
Crawlspace will not take much more.
1:20.467
Wrecked, and out of the race.
1:21.967
Tube Sock has put Crawlspace out.
1:23.467
That is Tube Sock taking Custard with them.
1:32.242
Thick Rick leaves something behind.
1:36.608
Extraordinary scenes.
1:41.483
Up it goes.
1:42.983
Big Randy is out.
1:44.483
Slapper is out.
1:52.500
There goes a piece of Thick Rick.
2:05.108
Gravy is airborne!
2:09.592
The Lieutenant is losing bits.
2:15.542
And it all goes wrong.
2:20.325
Wide Load is airborne!
2:28.633
Oh, that is a big one.
2:33.792
Up it goes.
2:39.000
They felt that in the back row.
2:43.467
Somebody is going to have to sweep that up.
2:56.525
That has come off.
3:02.217
This is the last of it.
3:11.558
Extraordinary scenes.
3:15.850
Stubbs is airborne!
3:20.442
The Lieutenant is coming to the flag.
3:23.442
The Lieutenant wins the derby.
SectionSurfaceLeader at exitElapsedFastest through
Smooth Descent Clay Slapper 22.883 Slapper 22.883
Smooth Descent Clay The Lieutenant 43.767 The Lieutenant 20.567
Smooth Descent Clay Gravy 1:06.533 Gravy 19.883
Smooth Descent Clay Gravy 1:27.608 Gravy 21.075
Smooth Descent Clay Gravy 1:50.558 Stubbs 20.083
Smooth Descent Clay The Lieutenant 2:14.692 The Lieutenant 20.800
Smooth Descent Clay The Lieutenant 2:38.025 Stubbs 22.392
Smooth Descent Clay Gravy 3:02.217 Wide Load 21.225
Smooth Descent Clay The Lieutenant 3:23.442 The Lieutenant 21.050
#TeamScoreFinishersPoints
1 LMP Lump Patrol 3 2/2 8
2 NUG The Nuggets 9 2/2 7
3 PCK The Pucks 11 1/2 6
4 WET The Wet Socks 13 2/2 5
5 NOO The Noodles 24 0/2 4
6 SFT The Soft Boys 24 0/2 3
7 HEA Basement Heat 26 0/2 2
8 BEA The Beans 26 0/2 1
Pack races score the sum of a team's best three finishing positions. Lower is better.

Race card

16 declared
1
Big Randy The Noodles
184 starts, 9 wins, average finish 6.0. Last five: 9-3-5-3-3.
27.22
12
Floppy Joe The Noodles
179 starts, 5 wins, average finish 8.8. Last five: 14-6-4-7-15.
219.30
4
Damp Kevin The Wet Socks
183 starts, 36 wins, average finish 3.7. Last five: 3-3-3-3-6.
2.61
11
Tube Sock The Wet Socks
188 starts, 24 wins, average finish 4.3. Last five: 8-5-2-9-2.
5.58
8
Sweaty Gerald The Beans
181 starts, 0 wins, average finish 11.1. Last five: 16-11-4-10-15.
219.30
5
Refried Ron The Beans
192 starts, 0 wins, average finish 12.9. Last five: 13-16-12-13-8.
219.30
9
Pilot Light Basement Heat
169 starts, 0 wins, average finish 13.5. Last five: 10-12-13-16-16.
219.30
13
Crawlspace Basement Heat
173 starts, 1 win, average finish 8.4. Last five: 9-7-9-11-6.
128.08
33
Thick Rick The Nuggets
178 starts, 6 wins, average finish 7.4. Last five: 12-5-8-8-14.
33.14
7
Stubbs The Nuggets
182 starts, 13 wins, average finish 7.6. Last five: 3-4-12-10-5.
21.47
17
Gravy Lump Patrol
198 starts, 24 wins, average finish 7.2. Last five: 8-7-11-7-5.
36.61
10
The Lieutenant Lump Patrol
180 starts, 38 wins, average finish 5.1. Last five: 3-6-1-10-5.
6.52
4
Wide Load The Pucks
193 starts, 36 wins, average finish 5.3. Last five: 9-1-8-1-2.
3.93
8
Slapper The Pucks
179 starts, 18 wins, average finish 8.4. Last five: 14-14-8-5-11.
219.30
21
Custard The Soft Boys
179 starts, 5 wins, average finish 7.8. Last five: 5-1-9-2-12.
85.46
0
Yolk The Soft Boys
179 starts, 0 wins, average finish 14.1. Last five: 16-15-15-13-16.
219.30

Course preview

6 sections · 135 m
Smooth Descent Smooth
8m ↓15°
Smooth Descent Smooth
14m ↓15°
Smooth Descent Smooth
8m ↓15°
Smooth Descent Smooth
38m ↓15°
Smooth Descent Smooth
30m ↓15°
Smooth Descent Smooth
38m ↓15°

Fourteen metres of corrugated deck plate laid across the main straight, crossed nine times a race. Nobody is ever taken out by it and nobody ever finishes intact — it does not wreck you, it disassembles you, one rivet at a time, and hands the pieces back at the flag. By the last lap the difference between a finisher and a heap of parts is simply who crossed it more cleanly. The stand sells earplugs at the gate; the noise is not a side effect, it is the attraction.

On the record

0 calls

Nobody has committed to anything yet.