Paper Mogul Sports
Derby · Season 10 · Round 26

The Pinch — Team Pack Race

The Pinch Works · The Pinch · 135 m · 16 competitors Pinch points Steep banking
FULL TIME Fairness
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Carnage — Lil Nugget survives to win

Lil Nugget took The Pinch — Team Pack Race for the The Nuggets. Big Randy finished second. 7 competitors failed to finish. The Wet Socks took the team honours.

#CompetitorTeamTimeGap Grid+/-ContactsTop speed
1 Lil Nugget NUG The Nuggets 3:19.925 9 +8 31 11.3
2 Big Randy NOO The Noodles 3:20.208 +0.28 2 0 13 10.5
3 Damp Kevin WET The Wet Socks 3:21.617 +1.69 3 0 12 10.5
4 The Heel WET The Wet Socks 3:22.125 +2.20 4 0 13 10.4
5 Butter Bean BEA The Beans 3:31.825 +11.90 6 +1 23 10.3
6 Old Gristle LMP Lump Patrol 3:31.858 +11.93 11 +5 35 12.0
7 Honey Mustard NUG The Nuggets 3:33.067 +13.14 10 +3 32 12.0
8 The Unit HEA Basement Heat 3:35.142 +15.22 8 0 24 10.3
9 The Kidney BEA The Beans 3:36.950 +17.03 5 -4 19 10.8
Squish WRECKED SFT The Soft Boys 16 +6 19 11.5
Floppy Joe WRECKED NOO The Noodles 1 -10 13 10.7
Slapper WRECKED PCK The Pucks 14 +2 29 12.1
Gravy WRECKED LMP Lump Patrol 12 -1 29 12.0
Puck Yeah WRECKED PCK The Pucks 13 -1 24 11.3
Radiator WRECKED HEA Basement Heat 7 -8 12 10.6
Yolk WRECKED SFT The Soft Boys 15 -1 11 11.8
3.400
A new leader — Squish. Career record: 3 wins from 300, average finish 5.7.
8.767
Old Gristle is airborne! Recent finishes: 2-1-3-5-3.
15.500
A new leader — Old Gristle.
20.050
Look at Puck Yeah go.
24.283
Radiator leaves something behind.
30.050
Absolute carnage.
34.550
Yolk is losing bits.
39.950
Somebody is going to have to sweep that up. Recent finishes: 3-2-6-3-3.
45.475
And it all goes wrong. Recent finishes: 6-5-11-6-12.
50.050
Big Randy is coming through. Recent finishes: 8-9-5-4-16.
56.200
A new leader — Squish.
1:00.692
Oh, that is a big one.
1:06.200
Squish goes to the front.
1:09.300
Damp Kevin has put Yolk out.
1:13.633
Up it goes.
1:20.050
Look at Honey Mustard go.
1:25.992
They will not want to see that again.
1:32.250
Extraordinary scenes.
1:36.625
Radiator is out, and Old Gristle did it.
1:43.250
Look at the state of it.
1:47.750
There goes a piece of Slapper.
1:53.492
Gravy is airborne!
1:59.558
Puck Yeah is losing bits.
2:04.600
Stripped to the shell.
2:10.233
Puck Yeah is out, and Floppy Joe did it.
2:15.808
Stripped to the shell.
2:21.200
Slapper will not take much more.
2:22.700
Big Randy has put Gravy out.
2:24.200
Squish has put Slapper out.
2:28.592
Damp Kevin has put Floppy Joe out.
2:34.250
Wrecked, and out of the race.
2:40.050
Look at Big Randy go.
2:47.425
Somebody is going to have to sweep that up.
2:53.067
Absolute carnage.
2:54.567
This is the last of it.
3:00.050
Look at Lil Nugget go.
3:09.300
There is nothing protecting Lil Nugget now.
3:13.875
That is real damage.
3:16.925
Lil Nugget has it.
3:18.425
They felt that in the back row.
3:19.925
It is Lil Nugget!
3:30.417
That is a long way off the ground.
SectionSurfaceLeader at exitElapsedFastest through
Smooth Descent Clay Old Gristle 20.367 Old Gristle 20.367
Smooth Descent Clay Slapper 41.733 Slapper 19.500
Smooth Descent Clay Squish 1:03.292 Squish 19.225
Smooth Descent Clay Squish 1:26.225 Big Randy 21.467
Smooth Descent Clay Slapper 1:47.708 Slapper 20.683
Smooth Descent Clay Squish 2:11.408 Old Gristle 20.508
Smooth Descent Clay Damp Kevin 2:37.550 Big Randy 20.575
Smooth Descent Clay Lil Nugget 2:53.408 Lil Nugget 0.350
Smooth Descent Clay Lil Nugget 3:19.925 Big Randy 21.033
#TeamScoreFinishersPoints
1 WET The Wet Socks 7 2/2 8
2 NUG The Nuggets 8 2/2 7
3 NOO The Noodles 13 1/2 6
4 BEA The Beans 14 2/2 5
5 LMP Lump Patrol 19 1/2 4
6 HEA Basement Heat 23 1/2 3
7 SFT The Soft Boys 26 0/2 2
8 PCK The Pucks 26 0/2 1
Pack races score the sum of a team's best three finishing positions. Lower is better.

Race card

16 declared
12
Floppy Joe The Noodles
228 starts, 9 wins, average finish 9.1. Last five: 14-1-13-7-15.
95.50
1
Big Randy The Noodles
225 starts, 14 wins, average finish 6.1. Last five: 1-15-9-7-12.
11.72
4
Damp Kevin The Wet Socks
233 starts, 43 wins, average finish 3.8. Last five: 3-4-6-5-7.
1.59
9
The Heel The Wet Socks
211 starts, 20 wins, average finish 5.5. Last five: 12-6-2-1-5.
6.69
6
The Kidney The Beans
226 starts, 0 wins, average finish 10.1. Last five: 7-11-13-13-7.
219.30
22
Butter Bean The Beans
239 starts, 1 win, average finish 8.7. Last five: 9-5-11-16-11.
78.06
4
Radiator Basement Heat
252 starts, 0 wins, average finish 13.1. Last five: 13-14-12-9-16.
219.30
1
The Unit Basement Heat
228 starts, 4 wins, average finish 7.6. Last five: 8-4-10-8-5.
30.36
0
Lil Nugget The Nuggets
231 starts, 5 wins, average finish 8.8. Last five: 13-5-11-6-11.
112.91
2
Honey Mustard The Nuggets
237 starts, 8 wins, average finish 8.0. Last five: 6-9-3-14-14.
64.38
44
Old Gristle Lump Patrol
244 starts, 59 wins, average finish 4.9. Last five: 5-2-12-8-2.
6.83
17
Gravy Lump Patrol
244 starts, 29 wins, average finish 7.1. Last five: 1-6-9-9-2.
26.70
69
Puck Yeah The Pucks
224 starts, 6 wins, average finish 12.3. Last five: 15-10-16-14-13.
219.30
8
Slapper The Pucks
221 starts, 24 wins, average finish 8.6. Last five: 11-12-12-15-13.
203.66
0
Yolk The Soft Boys
227 starts, 0 wins, average finish 14.3. Last five: 16-14-15-13-14.
219.30
2
Squish The Soft Boys
232 starts, 1 win, average finish 10.8. Last five: 13-15-14-4-15.
219.30

Course preview

6 sections · 135 m
Smooth Descent Smooth
30m ↓15°
Smooth Descent Smooth
38m ↓15°
Smooth Descent Smooth
11m ↓15°
Smooth Descent Smooth
8m ↓15°
Smooth Descent Smooth
11m ↓15°
Smooth Descent Smooth
38m ↓15°

A disused rolling mill with an oval laid through the old loading bay, and a gap in the wall under four metres wide. Sixteen arrive at that gap together, two get through, and the rest sort it out — nine times a race, in front of a crowd that has stopped pretending it came for any other reason. The wall is original ironwork and has never once been repainted, on the grounds that it would only want doing again by Tuesday. Standing room is capped for reasons the management prefers not to put in writing.

On the record

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